01 Coping with Tantrums at 1 Year Old
As you're busy setting rules for your child, they are also trying to take control of their own destiny, which makes conflicts between you inevitable. The conflict begins when your child, around 1 year old, starts shaking their head at you or firmly saying "no" to your requests. By the time your child is approaching 2 years old, their resistance might escalate to screaming or throwing tantrums, including lying on the floor, clenching their teeth, kicking and screaming, banging fists on the ground, or even holding their breath. While these behaviors can be hard to tolerate, they are normal (and even healthy) ways for children of this age to handle conflicts.
You should try to see the problem from your child's perspective. Like all children of this age, they believe the whole world revolves around them. They are striving for independence, and most of the time, you encourage them to be strong and assertive. However, there are times when you stop them from doing something they really want to do, and then redirect them to something else. This can be confusing for them, and they may not understand why you keep hindering them or be able to verbally express their frustration. The only way they can express their frustration is through their actions.
Tantrums are almost inevitable with children. The main way a child expresses their tantrums is mostly determined by their personality. If the child is adaptable, easygoing, optimistic, and easily shifts attention, they might never kick or scream but instead just say "no" with a stern face or turn their head away when you try to educate them. Their resistance is subtle. On the other hand, if the child is lively, enthusiastic, and persistent, their tantrums might be more intense. It's important to constantly remind yourself that these behaviors are neither good nor bad and don't reflect on your parenting abilities. The child isn't deliberately trying to make you angry; they are just going through a normal phase of growth and development, which will pass sooner or later, although perhaps not as quickly as you'd like.